Starting therapy, while exciting, has got me incredibly worried. Insurance covers part of the therapy costs, but if I get my T letter, I will have no way to pay for HRT.
I’m actively looking for a job, but it would really put my mind at ease if I just had some sort of income in the meantime.
Anything, even just a $5 sketch will help. Every cent goes towards the cost of HRT.
I’ve lowered my prices a bit, the highest price is $15 for a full color+full background piece.
Don’t feel bad at all if this is something you’d rather not spend your money on, or something you cannot afford to spend your money on. But if you’d like some art and even just consider me, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Don’t be surprised if after starting T your chest dysphoria actually gets worse. A few reasons for this:
- The rest of your body is now manlier and hairier and you would most likely pass even if mostly naked… if it wasn’t for your chest. This will be frustrating as fuck.
- Your chest may also get hairy. While this is good on one hand, because it makes your chest seem less feminine, those parts will now look even more alien and out of place. This will most likely weird you up while you’re showering, changing, and in general whenever you have to get naked for some reason.
- At first, after T you might be be euphoric and distracted by every small change, counting the new hairs on your chin and trying to understand if your hairline is changing or if you are actually balding early. However after a while you will get used to it, and any further changes will also become less noticeable, meaning it’s easy to focus again on the parts of your body that make you uncomfortable.
- After T and before surgery, unless you are content with being No-Op, you will be in a halfway state between where you were before and where you want to go. This can be very disorienting.
- Also you might get anxious about being visibly trans during medical examinations and the like.
In short becoming more dysphoric about your chest after T is not that weird and you shouldn’t panic if it happens. Be prepared for it before starting T because it’s the kind of thing doctors don’t warn you about in the informed consent sheet.
That is wholly and truly why I want to make videos, for kids like you.
I was too afraid to start going by my true name and pronouns in high school, but part of me wishes I had gotten that head start. High schoolers are awful, but true friends will never judge you harshly.
I want to encourage bravery in other people, even if I haven’t completely found it in myself. You are strong. It’s the hardest thing in the world to hide your true self. Whether you decide to let him out, or wait to do it until later for your safety and happiness, I support you!
I wish you all the luck in the world for your future. :)
Transitioning is not a form of activism.
It is an act of survival.